Bizarre post-Darkness machine rock from Yorkshire

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Fast Lady – The Money Shot

Fast Lady are Doncaster’s, if not the world’s, finest exponents of “machine rock” classic-sounding metal songs performed with the aid of a laptop in place of a drummer, lending this debut a curdled, unsettling quality. The Money Shot is the trio’s straight-faced homage to the New Wave Of British Heavy Metal and features several songs about denim-clad loose women (“Love Science”, “Rock Quimmen”) and one about the drummer from Def Leppard (“Living Life With One Arm”).

Every line yelped by Axl Rose-alike frontman Sebastian Falkstaff you’ve heard a million times before, just as Pepe Florente’s crude riffage will be suspiciously familiar to Black Sabbath fans. Basic stuff, but unfailingly entertaining.